Okay, so.... I'm posting this now because I don't know if I'll have a chance later in the day... I just got home from rehearsal for LOL. I know what you're saying...
"LAUREN!" You say, dropping your bowl of cheerios and not even caring about the mess it makes as it shatters on the floor. "12:30 - that's so LATE!"But fear not - it IS late, but the rehearsal was not that long... we were suppose to be there at 9.
I can see you now - freezing as you clean up your mashed cheerios/broken bowl/spilled milk mess. "NINE?" you say. "AS IN PM?"
Yes - PM... and please, stop yelling... I'm right here. I can hear you just fine. You see, there were some musicians in the theater until 9, and we had to put the set together after they left... and this is where the blog post comes in...
I'm thankful for moments that put things into perspective.
I was talking to my friend Donna today - I don't want to say I was complaining, but I kind of was... Sarah called me on it the other day, I was whining because I couldn't get a scene memorized... I got it, by the way, Sarah... haha. Anyway - I was complaining. Donna's a great chick - and she's one of the girls that I can just joke around with - so I was talking about my latest blog post and she made the mistake of asking me how I was doing... here's the conversation:
Lauren
I finally posted a blog post that didn't mention Donnie AT ALL
8:48pmDonna
O WOW!! that's big news go u!!
8:48pmLauren
lol
8:48pmDonna
how are ya??
8:49pmLauren
good
a little stressed
8:50pmDonna
i am good 2..and kinda confused...why ya stressed??
8:50pmLauren
I just got out of dress rehearsal for a musical at my church
at 9:30 (in about 30 minutes)
I have to go to the college
and put together the set for my other play
then I have dress rehearsal for that until God knows when
8:51pmDonna
oh wow that's alot...
8:51pmLauren
tomorrow I have a 10 am call for the show at the college
and a 2 pm show
then a 5:15 call for the musical at the church and a 6 o clock show
Monday I have to make like, 50 thousand calls, and I have a 5 oclock call for the show at the college again
then I have a week of crunch rehearsals
and another musical at the church - but it's a DIFFERENT musical so I have to learn new lines
plus, I'm somewhat in charge of the other musical
so I have to learn lines, as well as stage direction
as well as set up the set, etc
my status is from a new kids song - but right now it's how I feel >.<
8:57pmDonna
holy diver...
wow
8:57pmLauren
yeah
lol
8:57pmDonna
well good luck with all of this and i hope you can get a break soon
I was in a very woe is me mood - kind of like, why why why why why why WHY did I sign on for so much at once?? I was tired, and I was dreading today... I still kind of am, but... well, let's continue.
Because I need to learn 3 plays, I usually will try to flush my mind between rehearsals. In other words - do one play, then do something completely mind numbing, and remind myself of the next play, run through that till I have it down, and repeat. I didn't really have a lot to do, so I ended up digging through any NKOTB blogs that I hadn't read while I was on break and what not, and the first one I read was called simply, "Grateful." The reason it caught my eye is because of NaBloPoMo - the theme for December is thanks, and it's always nice to read up on stuff and get an idea of what other people are thankful for... perhaps have a moment where you go, OH YEAH, I'm thankful for that, too! So I started reading it - Jordan Knight wrote it, and as I read it, I was just struck with this sudden feeling of SUCK IT UP.
"WHY?" I hear you ask, having finally cleaned up your spilled cheerio fiasco. And, if I may point out, you're still yelling. I realize that the sun may be up while you're reading this, but let's face it, if you're reading it and you aren't in church, then it's real early and people may be sleeping. You need to be more considerate. If you ask nicely, I'll tell you. "...why?" That's better. Here is the first paragraph of the blog - as you read it, you may see a few comparisons to a conversation you read seconds before... lol.
After the show in Vancouver I was talking to a fan- I really don’t
like referring to people as fans, so lets say supporter… That feels
better.
So anyway, I was talking about how after the Seattle show (the
following night) we have to get on a plane at 1 in the morning, then
land in LA at 4 am then be up at 7:30 am for soundcheck at the AMA’s
and then fittings and then a run thru and then try to get a couple
hours sleep before getting ready for red carpet and then the awards
show at 5 pm and then we are the second performance of the night.
Now when I was saying it, I wasn’t really complaining but I guess I
had a little “whoa is me” in my voice, maybe a little dramatic.
And she very dryly said “nice life” with a tad of sarcasm. I got a
good chuckle at it. I’ve felt that I have been rightly grateful thru
out for all the amazing things that have happened to me/us, but it’s
always funny to be checked up on.
SEE? Yeah, I know... what are the odds? It was one of those things where I just had to give props to God, give him the ole nod and just say, alright, I hear ya.
The thing that really jumped out at me was this line: "I've felt that I've been rightly grateful thru out for all the amazing things that have happened to me." It grabbed my attention because I realized, I haven't really been grateful for anything. I've just been very, ugh, I have to do this. Ugh, I have to do this. Ugh, I have to do this, this, this, and this. It's been a very blah attitude.
But - that one line made me step back and look at everything differently... I mean, I need to think about it. Instead of thinking, UGH I NEED TO MEMORIZE THREE PLAYS, I need to realize, WOW - I'm in 3 plays at once! It may not be my big break, but it at least says there are enough people in this town that think I'm somewhat talented when it comes to acting. Not to mention, all the practice I'm getting! I'm writing, directing, managing, etc. I'm making new friends, I'm expanding my creative horizons, and I'm making my name known. How can that be a bad thing??? Yes, it's going to be hard work, but lots of things are hard work - and the more work you put in, the more satisfaction you get when it's over.
I also realized that, dangit, if it was really as bad as I was claiming it to be, I would have given up a long time ago... I didn't, because whether I admit it or not, I love acting. I can complain until I'm blue in the face, but when it's all said and done, I'd much rather be on that stage making a fool out of myself then making buko bucks behind some desk.
I'm thankful I happened upon that blog - because, quite frankly, I needed that slap in the face, and I needed that wake up call. Thank you, Jordan, for putting things into perspective! And thank you everyone who has ever supported me, or put up with my whining. You guys are awesome! I hope to have some video of the plays, but no promises.
I'm now going to force myself to sleep - I'm going to need it. Tomorrow is going to be insane, but I have high hopes!!
Get ya mind right - I've finally got mine right! :)
~L.
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